You miss home. Yet, you realize that you made this decision to leave and pursue something you don’t even enjoy. You have to though because you started it. You miss your friends. You miss how you used to hang out every day and talk for hours as if you haven’t talked in a long time. Now, it seems like the time difference creates some sort of barrier between you. It seems that they’ve forgotten you.
You are lonely. You cry every night and no one sees it because deep down, you have to show everyone how happy you are. Between fake smiles and vibrant stories, they wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. You don’t try to make them see. They wouldn’t understand anyways.
You stay awake every night always thinking how much better it would be to just go home and be with the ones you love. Then again, you don’t want to disappoint anyone. You don’t want anyone to think you’re a quitter so here you are, holding on to whatever strength to have left, trying to go on with life and feeling more alone than ever in a city full of people.
And you can’t do anything about it but cry.